Another New Year

I’m back. And about to celebrate another new year as my birthday is the 17th.

I just got back from a wonderfully short trip to Hershey Park. A gift from my sister. And a much needed break. Spent time with her (Kathleen), my brother-in-law Vince, my niece Michelle, her husband Brian, and their kids, Jack and Norah. My nephew Michael and his wife Leyla. And of course my daughter Jessica and grandson Dominic. Kathleen and Vince rented a villa. It had 4 huge bedrooms each with a bathroom (complete with an amazing shower!) with a common area. There was a concierge right across the way from us where we had breakfast and FREE candy. They also offered snacks and drinks in the afternoon and a campfire s’mores at night. A shuttle took us to the park which was literally across the street. Spent the day at the park and in the evening spent time with each other in the common area in our villa. We celebrated Michelle’s 40th and Jessica’s 35th birthdays. Surprised both of them. I wrote Mad Libs for both of them. Dominic played with his cousins. Jess went on the “big kid” rides with her cousins. Dominic went on car rides where he “drove”, train ride and the monorail. We went to the zoo area. Walking the park was a challenge for me as it was the first big excursion since my osteomyelitis and it took its toll. I ended up with heat exhaustion on the first day. But I sat when I needed to, drank water and Kathleen and I chatted. 

She looks weary. A term I used for my mother when I thought she was getting tired of her daily routine. Kathleen says she just “feels old”. She will be 63 in July. I told her that is not old. I know she has had a couple of episodes of aphasia, and it may be worse than I think or than she is saying, but I told her I will accept this version for now if she doesn’t wish to tell me anymore. 

Three days of family, of what matters most. It is always so good to see them. 

As for me, I will be 61, which is not old, but will begin a new chapter in my life. A chapter I never thought I’d enter, or even want to, but am getting a divorce. After a gut-punch announcement from my husband that he is no longer in love with me and hasn’t been for three years, our marriage is coming to an end. The hurt is insurmountable. The emptiness runs deep. The unanswered “what happened” will remain unanswered. I don’t know what to do with this love I have for him. I can’t pack it in a box and put it in the attic. Can’t exactly put it in the trash on Tuesday for pick-up. Maybe in the recycle? Guess that’s something I’ll have to figure out. 

Nonetheless, I’m back. My blogs will be a combination of writing tips, personal stories, personal opinions, book reviews and whatever YOU, my readers, would like to see here or learn about. 

Until next time…Breathe